We meet so many people everyday.
From the beginning of our lives we have crossed so many paths and have seen and talked to so many faces. But from all those many there comes a few special ones
To whome we decide to hand a part of of lives..a part of our selves.
Thinking, knowing and believeing that no matter what they will handle it well.
We speak, we chat, we share all our happiness and sadness to them like no one we had.
The happines, the excitement,the care and everything we hold within while just to talk to them seems nothing but perfection when it feels like, yes what else do i need more in this world when i finally have the one being who gets me completely. Years pass and then..then it hits you so so hard you could never imagine it would. The being we thought knew us in and out and thought the same about them..are not the same anymore. Did they change? Did we change?
Were we ignorant not to see it before ? What happened? Yes, the questions wont stop. How, why,when.. Can it even be ? Did i just waste my part of life believe that no they wont?
Well, it’s all left you to answer these questions. And again it’s all upto you to decide weather you would like to take this positively, smile and move on or something horrible, a huge tragedy and cry your entire life and if possible destroy yourself in the process.
What would you chose? Alright lets forget how you and i feel about all of this.
Lets go back a little, no not to the part where we met our special people. A little more back..
When you and i were much much younger, when there was no one in our lives, except for our family. Alright. Yes there stop. Now stand there, Do you remember how you never come across that person till that time? Indeed it was a long time ago you can hardly remember, but try to remember one thing, you were always by yourself, and your reason of Happiness was all created by yourself. Not him, not her no one infact!. But than years passsed, they stepped in. They lit the fire of hapiness with just their presence in your life and now that it’s not like that anymore, you have no idea what exactly should you do.
You cant go back to being a 5 years, nor can to force the person to change, you are not their instruction manual and nor are you thiers. You start feeling lonely, alone, sad.. You get this sudden urge to talk to them, to let yourself out to them, but yet again it hits you and you remember how your can’t, how it’s not possible and how your heart begins to feel empty..heavy…uneasy.. And your mind begins up both the happy and sad memories. You smile with the happy one and later cry thinking of the sad, hurtful ones..You are lost, you no longer know yourself. You no longer love yourselve becuase you though that person was more than enough to love you.. And you want to end it. You just dont know how. Memories, memories, memorie, the past.. The present and what should you think of tomorrow.. ? Will it change, will they change back? Will they come back?.. You think of all. You begin to feel this strange emptyness inside, because of their absense and even if they were or are still around you continue to feel that. And you wonder, why just why wont this emptyness get filled.
But then, that’s not it. You forget who you are are, what your identity .. Why are do you exist and right there is where you’ve lost yourself completely, why know why? Because you’ve forgotten the one who gifted you this life, the one who creted you.. The one becuse of whome you have countlss mount of blessings in your life too. Perhaps, you may not see it since you are crumpled with pain.
So what would you do then ? Well i’m no one to instruct you what you should, because eventually it will and always does come from within.
You need to find yourself, not because you are lost, but because you have lost Allah too.
The minute you began questioning why are you here, and what’s existance, that’s when you should realize you are questioning Allah itself. But hey hold on. Dont be sad, we all go through this phrase. Dont’t be ashamed , it is a part of life. Beaisder if you never got this broken you would never find your true self with your true love( Allah) in the 1st place. Dont be hard on yoursself, because people never say you the way you wanted them to see, or treat you the way you wanted them to treat. But you remained good, and that’s all that matters. So what if they never realize? Do you know who realizes? Allah does. He watches your every step. The angles sitting next to you know and writes down the good you’ve done. So stop being sad, count your blessing whenever it hits you, Look you are here, right now living, brething, and reading this. What if you weren’t? There are people who stay in the far far worse place than yours and have 1000 times worse misry than your. What about them?
So be thankful, Afterall Allah does say if you be thankful ill grant you blessings.
So now we come down to the part where you fee alone, lost and wanted. You look around you have no to share it all with. Well, maybe you do, but you dont trust them with yourself. What can you do now? Well the answer is again find Allah.
You might be those people who say yeswedo pray but even after it you dont find peace, it still feels empty. Well chill, when you begin praying imagine you have the Prophet (puh) watching you. Imagine it your last prayer, imgine that the ka’bah is infront of you and finally imagine that this is your lat prayer which can either send you to hell or heaven. Trust you you’ll change the you pray and feel more connected to Allah. And dont forget he listens, to everything. You say you are in pain, thenask him to heal you, to make you stronger. And if possible. Leave, leave whatever dissapoints Allah and tell him that today i left this for your sake, so please remain with my and bring me closer to you.
In the end its Allah who you have left, only have heal and only and only HE can understand.
Well i hope this helped you more or less. Thank you for giving me your time to read this^_^
Stay safe, stay blessed and hey! Neveerr feel alone. Call upon Allah and he will surely come! Dont doubt him or the power of your duas